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Forest Moon of Endor looking for bass player

 
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TheKrakenBeast
Rehearsing
Rehearsing


Joined: Dec 28, 2015
Posts: 60
Location: Forest Moon of Endor

PostPosted: Fri Apr 21, 2017 2:59 pm    Post subject: Forest Moon of Endor looking for bass player Reply with quote

Without a doubt destined to be the next big metal sensation, Forest Moon of Endor is an innovative fusion of spicy melancholic melodic dark black bollywood cuisine and dysentery.

There is zero chance of us landing A VERY BIG CONTRACT, or any other kind of contract, but you may contract hepatitus from the filthy working conditions.
We have no songs, talent, money, or other musicians in this band, and so we feel it is time to recruit a bass player. Make no mistakes, this is going to be AWFUL.

We require the services of someone whose dubious musicianship came from dozens of decades of practice. To fit with the look of the band we are looking for member who are at absolute most 18 years of age.
A willingness to dress the part, and undress, is essential. You must also be completely shaved. Yes even your balls. If you think you have what it takes to impress us, please PM to set up an audition, or visit your nearest Kwik-E-Mart and drop your trousers.

Due to the uniqueness and innovativeness of this project, demos can only be provided upon you actually writing and recording some songs for us.
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Toon
Gig Ready
Gig Ready


Joined: Jan 14, 2012
Posts: 554

PostPosted: Fri Apr 21, 2017 6:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's times like this that Melband needs a like button.
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Toon
Gig Ready
Gig Ready


Joined: Jan 14, 2012
Posts: 554

PostPosted: Fri Apr 21, 2017 6:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

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Slopo
Newbie


Joined: Nov 03, 2006
Posts: 22
Location: Northern suburbs

PostPosted: Fri Apr 21, 2017 10:11 pm    Post subject: Re: Forest Moon of Endor looking for bass player Reply with quote

TheKrakenBeast wrote:
... visit your nearest Kwik-E-Mart and drop your trousers.



OK... DONE!.......Now what?
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SLOPO
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gronk
Newbie


Joined: Jun 30, 2011
Posts: 13
Location: Hotel Bastardos

PostPosted: Sat Apr 22, 2017 12:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Must admit that I am sucking up my jealousy with this.

Is this the next big thing, or the one after? It's just that I need a few weeks to learn how to play.
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TheKrakenBeast
Rehearsing
Rehearsing


Joined: Dec 28, 2015
Posts: 60
Location: Forest Moon of Endor

PostPosted: Sat Apr 22, 2017 2:59 am    Post subject: Re: Forest Moon of Endor looking for bass player Reply with quote

Slopo wrote:
TheKrakenBeast wrote:
... visit your nearest Kwik-E-Mart and drop your trousers.



OK... DONE!.......Now what?

You can pull them up now. We'll be in touch. Thank-you for your patience.
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TheKrakenBeast
Rehearsing
Rehearsing


Joined: Dec 28, 2015
Posts: 60
Location: Forest Moon of Endor

PostPosted: Sat Apr 22, 2017 3:04 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

gronk wrote:
Must admit that I am sucking up my jealousy with this.

Is this the next big thing, or the one after? It's just that I need a few weeks to learn how to play.

Its next to the nearest biggest thing, or a close approximation at best. As this is a bollywood metal band don't even bother tuning your instrument. Nobody is going to know the difference.
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TheKrakenBeast
Rehearsing
Rehearsing


Joined: Dec 28, 2015
Posts: 60
Location: Forest Moon of Endor

PostPosted: Sat Apr 22, 2017 3:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Arrow Up
Still looking. This is going to be HUGE.
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